... an old coat tucked in our closet. The pills turned out to be Acyclovir. I found on here it is used to treat Herpes virus. Does that mean he may have herpes? He has never told me this. I am going to get checked before I ask him. :-( I hope he is taking this for something else. I am afraid to know the truth. He has never hidden any kind of medical problem from me. I guess there is just one way to find out. How do I approach him about this?
Hi, I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years. I am a little upset. I found some pills in?
Question posted by whathappened on 28 April 2011
Last updated on 5 October 2023 by Alezandra
Added 28 April 2011:
How contagious is this? I am mad at him. I am sad for him. I feel betrayed and I feel like he may be scared to loose me. I really am not sure how to feel.
Added 29 April 2011:I didn't know how to bring it up yesterday. He was in such a good mood. He was so sweet. I don't want him to think I think bad of him. I don't want my days to pass and sink into denial. He makes me so happy. I want to face what it is and move on. I feel like the bad guy. I’m so depressed.
5 Answers
Alezandra
5 Oct 2023
Personally i believe in putting it out there. The person who gave me herpes did it by force. While dating i threw it out there “hey by the way, I’ve got herpes”, the crazy thing is no man has ever turned away from me because of it. In fact the following question to my statement was always “ are you broke out now”. I haven’t ever gave it to anyone, i have been married now for 25 yrs And my man hasn’t got it. It’s definitely workable. I take acyclovir when i feel a tingle, before the eruption. But on a regular i do the L- lysine And it really does make a difference. He really should have told you from the gate, but he has obviously taken steps to make sure you don’t get it. So he cares, he maybe feels uncomfortable within his own self to share it. Hopefully this didn’t ruin your relationship and you’ve both gained the the trust needed for communicating with each other no matter what issues should arise.
Inactive
6 Aug 2018
Not necessarily. A lot of doctors prescribed this for treating genital herpes, but it can treat the beginning stage of shingles and also severe throat infection caused by virus.
bjoyful0881
14 March 2017
I feel for you. I really do, because I know how you feel and how your boyfriend feels. Typically acyclovir is used to treat one thing. It suppresses outbreaks of the herpes virus and in my opinion also shortens the pain and time when you do have an outbreak. I have HSV type 1- and have been with my husband for 4 years. He does not have it. It is possible to have a long and enjoyable sexual relationship when one person has it and the other does not. The key is just to avoid relations during an outbreak. In my experience, outbreaks can be brought on by stress and physical trauma to the area where the outbreaks happen. Many people who have this are not symptomatic. For those of us unlucky enough to have this condition, the meds help. You need to talk to your boyfriend if you think you are in it for the long haul. It took me several weeks to muster the courage to tell my husband when we first started dating. After I did, this huge weight lifted off my shoulders.
It will be an uncomfortable and awkward conversation.. just try to be compassionate toward your boyfriend. The fact that he is taking this med means he is trying to suppress the symptoms so YOU don't get it. He cares. He is just embarrassed.
nikatnite
12 May 2011
I have herpes and it is a very sensitive issue to bring up to someone for fear of isolation. Nonetheless, you have to trust that the person will see you as more than the disease. You do need to confront him about it but do it as non-judmental yet honestly as you can. YOU have the right to be informed and it is a betrayal to have such information hidden from you. So I say approach it without being confrontational but still with the level of extreme concern.
All the best!
DzooBaby
28 April 2011
Acyclovir is used for herpes viruses but there are three different types of herpes people can use them for. The first is the Herpes Simplex Type 2 which causes the genital herpes. Then there is the Herpes Simplex Type 1 which causes cold sores. And finally, acyclovir is also used for Herpes Zoster which causes shingles. Even if the man has Herpes Simplex Type 2, they are mainly contagious during breakouts-when he has active blisters. A very good frind of mine is married to a man with genital herpes. They have been married for over 20 years and she has never contracted them from him. They have 2 beautiful children together. Many people are frightened to tell their partners they have herpes because they find themselves being shunned by partners who are afraid of contracting herpes, and rightly so, but a person can have an active sexual relationship with someone with herpes as long as they take precautions during outbreaks.
Yes, it would have been more honest to tell you, but if you love this man then think about his side and his possible fears of losing you once you find out. It may not even be for genital herpes. He may just get cold sores. Read up on Herpes then ask him about it in a non acusatory manner. Let him tell you his reasons for not disclosing this. Give him a chance. You could lose out on a wonderful loving relationship.
whathappened
29 April 2011
Thank you. I can't seen my life with out him. I feel a little guilty because I think he tried to tell me. I blew off like "everyone gets some type of HPV" you know like fever blisters. He did mention to me several months ago that he thought he may have something and I did it again. See I have eczema and I get rashes all the time. I remember him asking me what this rash was that was on my thighs. I just thought it was another case of eczema. Now that I think about it was different and took a long time for redness to go away. I have to get checked. I don't know if he knows for sure what type he has but I think I have it. We used protection for the first couple months but he never told me he may have this. His ex-wife used to say he had something like this. He used to ask me if I believed it. I told him "no. I thought she was just angry." . That part makes me feel betrayed. If he did know then. :-(
blessedlife
14 May 2011
You really shouldn't put off talking to him. It may seem like you're the bad guy at first bringing it up and he may be offended and hurt, but by not talking about it, you are going to make yourself sick. If you talk about you, you can then find out what you need to do to protect yourself and move on from there. It doesn't have to mean the end of the relationship. It can mean an honest, sharing conversation and may even bring you two closer. Good luck.
whathappened
31 May 2011
Thanks for everything.
bjoyful0881
19 Dec 2011
You should know that I live in fear and abstinence do to my condition- HSV 2 -which I contracted from a "boyfriend" who cheated and took advantage of me. I just have no idea how to tell someone about this so I prevent myself from getting close to anyone. If you love him and you think he has tried to tell you, you should talk to him about it. Despite my fear, I too know people who are married where one partner has the condition and the other does not. It shouldn't be something to be ashamed of, unfortunately societies perception makes it quite difficult. Good luck.
CAMPOSPAULAK
25 Feb 2017
What happened, HSV and HPV are very different. I have both. The latter I got from a family member at age 2. The consequences? So far, two types of pre-cancerous masses/lesions. HSV I I was forced as an adult from an ex boyfriend who basically took the stance that he'd screw up my future. In many ways he did. Although I'm not involved with anyone atm, I've managed to not spread it as far as is known. As a woman, the stigma is still worse than for men. It's automatically a "slut"-like disease. I was horrified of having to tell a prospect. Definitely made quick relations off the table (not that I would) and made me worry that if I let someone get to know me, and me them, that I would be crushed if I told them and I saw the bottom of their shoes as they ran. But, if given time to get to know me and develop feelings, if they hit the pavement running ... well, that person didn't care that much after all.
Related topics
herpes simplex encephalitis, herpes simplex - suppression, herpes simplex, herpes zoster, varicella-zoster, acyclovir, herpes simplex, mucocutaneous/immunocompetent host, herpes simplex, mucocutaneous/immunocompromised host
Further information
- Acyclovir uses and safety info
- Acyclovir prescribing info & package insert (for Health Professionals)
- Side effects of Acyclovir (detailed)
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